


Serious

by ChocolateCannibal



Category: Naruto
Genre: Friendship, Humor, M/M, Romance, drunken antics, its ok they work things out, poor dumb naruto, poor long-suffering sasgay
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-17
Updated: 2018-02-17
Packaged: 2019-03-20 05:55:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13711281
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChocolateCannibal/pseuds/ChocolateCannibal
Summary: Naruto gets engaged to Hinata."Are you serious?""Why does everyone keep saying that? Of course I'm serious!"





	Serious

**Author's Note:**

> To refresh your memory of key dialogue from episode 478:
> 
> Naruto: Don’t make me repeat myself! Haven’t you figured it out yet?! Now that I think about it, you were always pretty stupid too…
> 
> Sasuke: Shut up, usuratonkachi.
> 
> This was for a tumblr prompt.

“Are you serious?” Sasuke asked.

“Why does everyone keep saying that? Of course I’m serious! This is as serious as it gets! It’s seriouser-“

“-More serious, dobe.”

“-seriouser,” Naruto insisted, “than a freaking heart attack! Hmph, and I thought best friends were supposed to be supportive.”

“Okay. If that’s what you want, I’ll support you.”

“You’ll what now?”

“In fact, we should get drinks.”

“Huh?”

“To celebrate your engagement to the intelligent, talented, beautiful Hyuuga Hinata. After all, this is a joyous occasion.”

“Uh…”

“Or shall I treat you to ramen? Your choice.”

“Okay, teme. Enough joking around. You’re starting to scare me.”

 

* * *

 

“You weren’t joking.”

Sasuke gestured to the bartender. He ordered a bottle of sake. Naruto snatched it away, took three hearty gulps, and slammed it on the counter. A thin crack emerged on the glass container; nothing spilled.

“Ya know,” he began, rocking the chair back to balance on two legs, “Kaka-sensei asked me the same thing.”

Sasuke raised an eyebrow.

“He said, ‘are you serious?’ And when I told him, ‘yeah, duh,’ he laughed and walked away. Just like that! Can you believe it?”

Naruto leaned a little too far back. He started falling, but didn’t notice. Sasuke steadied the chair.

“Then, then,” he continued, “I told Sai and he- he just- argh! Why aren’t more people happy for me?”

Sasuke took a small sip.

“Why, indeed.”

“Teme!”

The Uchiha finished his glass. He reached to refill it. Naruto grabbed the bottle, stuck out his tongue, and proceeded to drink the whole thing.

Sasuke sighed.

“Naruto.”

Naruto hiccupped. “Yeah?”

“Are  _you_  happy?”

“Well,” he scratched his cheek, pretending to think, “I will be with more sake in me. Oi, bartender!”

Naruto spent the next three hours drinking and complaining. Sasuke watched him. He ‘hn-ed,’ nodded, scoffed, and made smart-ass remarks at appropriate intervals. The drunker –ah,  _more_  drunk- Naruto got, the more he found himself staring at Sasuke. The more he stared, the more he noticed things.

His hair was longer. It didn’t stick up as much as it used to in the back. His fingers were really… slender. The bastard actually had really pretty, girly hands. And eyes. Pretty, sparkly,  _girly_  eyes. If Naruto leaned in, he could probably see his own reflection in the single black iris.

And his skin was… Clear. Just like his eye.

If Naruto leaned in really close, would he see any scars? Hell, did the bastard even have pores?

Probably not. Stupid beautiful Uchiha genes.

“Hey, Sasuke,” he slurred.

“What now?”

“You’d make a pretty girl.”

Sasuke’s eye twitched.

“Is that so.”

Naruto nodded rapidly. “Yeah, totally. You’d probably-“ hic “-be, like, a million times prettier than Hinata. And even with your-“ hic “-terrible personality, I’d totally ask you out.”

“Thanks.”

“Hell, maybe we’d be engaged right now instead of… I mean, she’s nice and all, but we, like, don’t have much in common. Heh. But you and me? We got that… The thing, y’know.”

Sasuke made an ambiguous grunting noise. He paid the bartender and slid gracefully out of his chair. Naruto followed. He didn’t know where they were going.

Well. He could just ask.

“Ne, Sasuke, where are we going?

“Home. You’re drunk.”

“But I’m  _hungry_. You said you’d buy me ramen,” he whined, slinging an arm over his best friend’s shoulder.

“Ichiraku’s is closed.”

“But- but! Hey, hey, what time is it anyways?”

“Late.”

Unhelpful, as usual. Some things never change.

“This is the second time, y’know.”

“Hm?”

“That you said you’d treat me to ramen.” Pause. “And didn’t.”

Sasuke shrugged his arm off.

“Put it on my tab.”

They fell into companionable silence. Naruto laced his hands behind his head, looking up. The stars were bright, out of focus, and made colorful little streaks when he squinted. Golden halos rippled around the occasional street light. A stray dog barked in the distance.

He dropped his hands to swing freely. Shadows appeared, fractured, vanished, and reappeared as the light changed. A pair of girls huddled together in an alleyway, talking, giggling, kissing-

“Lesbians,” Naruto whispered in awe.

Sasuke followed his gaze.

“Don’t stare, dobe.”

“Eh-heh. Um.”

Heat crept up his neck. Naruto glanced furtively at his friend.

“What?”

“Nothing,” he murmured, feeling dejected.

_Haven’t you figured it out yet?_

His own words echoed in his head. Sasuke really was stupid. Maybe even stupider than him.

Actually, no. If there was a stupidity contest, Uzumaki Naruto would win by a long shot, every single time.

Believe it.

“We’re here.”

Naruto found himself in front of his apartment door.

“Damn, already?”

“Give me your keys.”

Naruto patted his left pocket, then his right. He unzipped his jacket and turned it inside-out. Nope. Nothing but forgotten shuriken and loose change. He repeated the same process with his pants.

By then, Sasuke had already opened the door.

“How…”

“You forgot to lock it.”

“Oh,” he chuckled, “hey, aren’t you coming in?”

Sasuke gave him a bland look.

“No, don’t be like that,” Naruto said, dragging him inside, “I know you’re homeless, and it’s dangerous out there. What with all the ninja and- and- yeah.”

“…Homeless, you say.”

“Uh.”

“I guess it’s true.” Sasuke undid the clasp on his cape-thingie. He hung it over the back of a chair. Naruto caught himself staring at his empty sleeve. He shook his head, muttered something unintelligible, then stumbled to his dresser.

Sasuke needed clean clothes; he smelled like the bar. They were (finally!) the same height, but the bastard was kinda skinny. Too many vegetables, not enough ramen. Naruto vowed to fix that.

“I’m not wearing that,” Sasuke said.

“What’s wrong with it?”

Naruto waved the striped flannel set enticingly. Sasuke wrinkled his nose.

“Get me a normal shirt and some normal pants.”

“Asshole, just put it on!”

“No.”

After a pointless argument, Naruto wore his fun, comfy, totally  _un_ -childish pj’s and Sasuke agreed to a boring black shirt-pant combo that Naruto didn’t even know he owned.

“Hey, hey, whatdya wanna do now?” the blond slurred happily, “and don’t you dare say sleep-“

“-Sleep.”

“C’mon, don’t be like that. It’s only,” he squinted at his alarm clock, “two in the morning.”

“I’m leaving at noon.”

“What? Where? Why?”

“A mission. Don’t know. None of your business.”

“Damn it! You literally just got here.”

“Not literally.”

“Spare me the grammar lecture.”

“It’s diction, dobe.” Sasuke corrected, rummaging through Naruto’s apartment like he lived there. Which he did for a while, so it made sense. He dug up an old blanket from the back of the closet, tsk-ed at the bright green frog print, and dusted it off.

Naruto felt defensive. “Frogs are awesome, y’know.”

“How old are you?”

“Old enough to get married.”

Sasuke glared. He shoved Naruto off the couch and settled in. Naruto scowled. An impromptu wrestling match ensued, complete with yelling.

“Idiot,” Sasuke pushed him off, “let me sleep.”

Naruto tackled him. “No, I’m not done with you yet!”

“What the hell does that mean?” He blocked the blond’s terribly aimed punches.

“Don’t make me repeat myself!”

“You never make sense anyway.”

“We need to get drunk more! I mean, drink more- like, get drunker!”

“No, thanks.“

Naruto grabbed a pillow and started beating Sasuke over the head.

“You,” whack, “owe me, “ whack, “ramen!”

“Hey numbnuts!” Naruto’s neighbor banged on the wall, “keep it down in there! People are trying to sleep!”

“Ah, sorry!” he shouted back.

“I said SHUT UP!” she screeched.

Everything went dead quiet.

“Man, girls are scary,” Naruto whispered.

“Get off me.”

“Okay, but you’re not sleeping.”

Naruto had a few bottles of sake laying around. Actually, he had a whole shelf dedicated to those so-called engagement gifts. Which was perfect, because ever since the-  _that_  happened, drinking helped him cope with the, uh, the…

“Excitement?” Sasuke supplied flatly.

“Right. Super, uh, exciting stuff. Hinata is awesome and we are- we’re together. For good. No escape. Not that I’d want to…”

Silence, broken by the sound of Naruto slurping instant ramen as Sasuke looked on with disgust. The muted television cast a pale, uneven glow over the room. Outside, the moon shone full, bright, and white –not red- as it should be.

Everything was as it should be.

This… Blue eyes traced the smooth curve of a pale cheek, lingered on the sharp cut of fragile collarbones, down to hand curled gracefully around the neck of a bottle. This was as good as it would get.

“Naruto.”

Naruto swallowed.

Sasuke spoke without looking at him.

“You’re lying.”

He should have known better.

“Yeah, sorta.”

“You’re unhappy.”

“Hinata’s got nothing to do with that.”

Curiously, “Oh?”

“Can’t you stay a little longer?”

“I don’t see how that’s relevant.”

“Would you come to the wedding?”

“No.”

“Some friend you are.”

“You’ve got plenty of other friends.”

“None of them are you. You’re the only one, y’know, that I…”

“Hm?”

“Feel this way about.”

“When you say weird, vague things like that, people might misinterpret-” a heavy, long-suffering sigh,  “-do you know what that sounds like?”

“Yeah,” Naruto drummed his fingers in the space between them, “what about it?”

Sasuke stood up. He promptly fell back onto the couch, stood up more slowly, and began a deliberate, unsteady walk to the door.

“Hey, hey, where’re you going?” Naruto lept up, bounding after him.

“Need some air. Leave me alone.”

“Not a chance,” he flashed a shit-eating grin.

Sasuke was unimpressed. “Whatever.”

They ended up at the old training ground. Sasuke placed his now empty bottle on a wooden post. The middle post, where Kakashi tied him up and left him to starve.

…okay, that was exaggerating things, but he had been really fucking hungry. And Sasuke, of all people, offered him food. Friendship. A future.

That was the first time.

Then, the bastard did it again, and again, and again, when he had nothing to gain and everything to lose. Of course Naruto went after him. Of course he’d never give up, no matter what.

“It’s the least I could do,” he said, breaking the silence.

Sasuke hiccupped.

“What now, Usuratonkachi?”

“I never thanked you for what you did that day.”

“Hn.”

“Or any of those other times.”

“It’s nothing. I told you, my body-“

“-moved on it’s own,” Naruto finished with lilting sarcasm, “right. Thanks anyway.” He offered Sasuke his own bottle, which was still half full.

“Hn.” He took it.

As Naruto watched him drink, he thought.

Something changed in the past few years. Ever since Sasuke left again- fine, since Naruto  _let_  him leave, he was…

Uzumaki Naruto never gave up. He didn’t give up when he failed the graduation exam. He didn’t give up when everyone said he’d amount to nothing. He didn’t give up in the face of impossible odds, against impossibly powerful opponents, when all hope was gone and the world damn near ended.

Even if the earth started spinning backwards and the entire ocean evaporated into the sky, he’d never give Sasuke up.

But that day, when he finally let go of the person that matters the most, something changed.

“You’ve changed,” Sasuke read Naruto’s damn mind again, “you used to be…”

“I know.”

A gentle breeze rustled through the trees. Moonlight faded under the cover of a wispy cloud. Sasuke rose to his feet, set the second bottle next to the first, and said, “It’s cold. Let’s head back.”

Naruto woke up to an empty apartment and two red pills and a glass of water on his nightstand.

Oh, Sasuke.

The jerk left without saying ‘goodbye.’

Well, whatever. Hangover aside, Naruto had something to take care of before they met again.

“Are you serious?”

Thin, black brows furrowed delicately. Long fingers tangled in a familiar show of nervousness.

“Why,” Naruto pouted, “does everyone ask me that?”

Hinata giggled sweetly. Naruto was utterly mystified.

“But, like, you’re taking this well. Like, really well.”

“It’s hard to say why, but I’m relieved. Besides, it’s better to do this now than after the wedding, ne? Father’s going to have a fit-“

Shit! Hiashi!

“-but I’ll take care of that,” She finished, glancing shyly to the side.

“Aw man, Hinata, I don’t deserve a girl like you.”

“No,” she nodded, meeting his gaze for the first time in ages, “no you don’t.”

As far as breaking off engagements, this was…

Surprisingly okay.

“And Naruto-kun?”

“Yeah?”

“Let’s stay friends.”

He pulled her into a bone-crushing hug. Her shoulder was moist when he pulled back. Hinata took it in stride. She patted his back indulgently, and paid for both of their ramen.

That girl really was one in a million.

“So,” Sasuke said, “you dumped her, cried, and  _she_  comforted  _you_. That seems backwards.”

“I didn’t tell you I cried!”

“You just did,” he smirked.

“Teme!” Naruto punched Sasuke’s shoulder. Sasuke allowed it, but ‘tsked’ in disapproval.

“Childish.”

They stood under the tree outside the village gates.

Okay, there were a lot of trees, but this was the tree where they had that talk.

Y’know _, until things between us are resolved_. That one.

Steel glinted subtly under Sasuke’s cape. The headband was a reminder of an unfulfilled promise.

Uzumaki Naruto never went back on his word. He put this off long enough.

“Anyways,” he idly kicked some dirt around, “aren’t ya gonna ask why I did it?”

“…not my business.”

“Yes it is!”

“Because we’re friends?” he drawled.

“Something like that.”

Sasuke raised a brow. Naruto took a deep breath.

“I was stupid-“

The bastard snorted. Naruto ignored him.

“-and a coward. For, like, a really, really long time, but then we got drunk and I had an, uh…”

“Epiphany.”

Naruto smiled. Unlike his signature grin, this was a small, slow, fleeting thing.

“Dunno how you do that, but yeah. And all those years ago, when we were,” no way to sugar coat this, “bleeding to death, I said some stuff and when you asked me what I meant, I told you not to make me repeat myself. Do you remember?”

Sasuke nodded.

“Did you ever figure it out?”

Wind blew a few stray leaves in aimless circles.  _That_  day, they were green with spring. Now, they were yellow, orange, and bright, bloody red. Sasuke watched the dead things flutter into the sky, until they were out of sight.

Naruto clenched and unclenched his fingers. He wet his lips. Glanced surreptitiously at his friend, at the forest, back to the ground.

He never admitted  _it_. Never put  _it_  into words, not even in his own head.  _It_  was just something he felt, knew in the marrow of his bones, and nothing as crude as language would ever do that feeling justice.

But he had to start somewhere. 

Naruto sighed. He briefly met Sasuke’s steady gaze, then looked away. His cheeks grew warm. “Are you really going to make me say it?”

“I still don’t you what ‘it’ is, so…”

Naruto took a half-step closer. Sasuke’s heel inched backwards. He pursed his lips, but held his ground.

“Listen up, bastard, and don’t you dare ask me if I’m serious. This is as serious as it gets.”

“Stop stalling, idiot.”

Called out again.

“Damn it, fine. Since you asked so nicely-“

_Here goes nothing._

“-I love you.”

**Author's Note:**

> You can interpret the exchange in 478 a lot of ways. 
> 
> First of all, that trope of Naruto "not knowing" that he loves Sasuke is cute but not canon-compliant. He's well aware of his feelings and has been since he was thirteen. (You gotta observe really, really closely to pick up on this tho. Real sneaky, Kishi.)
> 
> For the purpose of this fic, Naruto thought he made his feelings perfectly clear at the Final Valley. He interpreted Sasuke leaving the village as rejection, which is why he ‘gave up’ and got together with Hinata. 
> 
> Sasuke thought Naruto was just being an idiot who didn’t realize how gay he sounded and chalked the whole thing up to wishful thinking. He cried because he wanted to believe Naruto’s ‘confession,’ but thought it was too good to be true. 
> 
> Naruto realized on the training field (in this fic) that he gave up on Sasuke without giving it 100% and that he actually had to say “it” for Sasuke to understand. He never said “it” because a small word like ‘love’ felt woefully insufficient. Also, fear of rejection is a b i t c h.
> 
> Hope that clears everything up.
> 
> Btw I'm working on all of my other fics. Simultaneously. And used this as an excuse to procrastinate. Thanks for being patient.


End file.
